Irrigon, Oregon

Saturday, May 4, 2002

Ihave to admit that I had never previously known where Irrigon was, let alone that it existed at all. But I suppose one of the goals of a rally like the Grand Tour is to expose otherwise geographically ignorant motorcyclists like myself to new places. The places in between the new places are nice as well.

I knew this was going to be along day so I left the compound a little earlier than usual. The local skies were overcast (not unusual for this part of the country in this part of the year) but I knew that as I headed east, I would see more blue clouds than grey ones.

Irrigon is situated near the Columbia River and also near Umatilla (despite that town's strange name, I did know about Umatilla.) Because this was to be a long day, I elected to stay on the major freeway between Portland and Irrigon, in this case, Interstate 84.

I had been along this route several times before, including a time or to in pursuit of closer rally checkpoints. Along the way I passed Multnomah Falls, the Cascade Locks, Bonniville Dam and the crossing at The Dalles into Dallesport.

Unlike my previous journeys through this area, the wind was not blowing with gale force. In fact, STraddle and I moved along at a good clip with very little in the way of "course correction." Being relaxed, I was able to lay back, put my feet up on the bars and enjoy a poofy umbrella drink. Perhaps not... I was relaxed though.

Just after Boardman (no doubt named after a bored man) I turned onto US-730 in a more or less northeasterly direction. US-730 becomes S. Main Street about 16 miles later as you enter Irrigon. This is significant, and you will likely find out why in the next paragraph.

...wow! Is it the next paragraph already? Okay, maybe I'll explain myself in the next several paragraphs... hang in there.

It has become my habit to keep very general directions written out on a 3x5 card that is tucked into a map pocket on the sleeve of my jacket. At some point as I approach my destination, I exchange that card with one that has more detailed directions such as "turn left onto Bumpus St." and so on. I had made the card swap at a rest stop just west of The Dalles.

According to the card at my left, I was looking for a place called Gravy Daves on North Main street. Since I was already on South Main Street and since I was traveling more or less north, I figured I'd see it eventually. As I was leaving town I came to the realization that there was no North Main Street.

I found a wide spot in the road and turned around thinking that maybe there was a typo in the tour book or that I had incorrectly transcribed the address. Turned around and gaining speed, I pulled my helmet visor down... And that's when I heard the noise.

A really loud noise, it was. The sound of rushing wind blowing past my ears; something that I shouldn't be hearing since my visor was down... except it wasn't down exactly. It was sort of flapping against the helmet on the left side. Not good.

I stopped in front of a small business and asked a woman who was standing near the door where I might find Gravy Daves. (I figured I'd tend to my helmet problem when I got to the restaurant.) She had never heard of a Gravy Daves and was pretty sure there wasn't any establishment with that name in Irrigon.

Something strange was afoot (and it didn't have five toes). There was no N. Main there was no Gravy Daves. It was almost as if I had... uh... put the wrong card into my map pocket. Gravy Daves was my NEXT stop. Fishing out the card for Irrigon I found that Bake's Restaurant was indeed on S. Main Street... in Irrigon.

Basking in the glow of my mental gaff, I took some time to examine the helmet. A small plastic screw had worked its way loose just under the visor. Fortunately the visor itself had retained the screw and so it was just a matter of fishing it out and tightening.

I found Bake's with relative ease given that it had a very large sign out front, hidden in plain sight. Inside I found a rally stamp and a nice bowl of beef noodle soup.

Before I left, I made sure that my reference cards weren't stacked against me. The previous hand had been a royal flush.

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